How to get information about your regrets before the age of 40 by Mark Anthony Dyson
Not all career decisions are fun stories to tell later, even if things turned out okay. We often lack foresight and insight when we are in our early 20s. Sometimes our “yes” should have been “no” – and vice versa.
Setting career strategies and goals takes work. Yes, we want to take control of our careers by taking full responsibility for our actions, creating opportunities for ourselves, and staying connected. There are times when we put a lot of food on our plates, but we only eat a portion and often waste the food.
Some decisions seemed terrible at the time, but it was the right call. You might not appreciate them until later, like when you’re over 40. I thought of a few, and you might be able to spot them sooner than I did:
1. You said “no” and missed
When you’re young, you appreciate moving up the ladder and want life experiences with friends. You want both, but saying no to career opportunities (or one) leaves you with feelings of unrequited love. On the ride back to reality, yours Values mean more than statusAnd satisfaction means more than seclusion in a career.
It’s bittersweet, but those relationships you built through your experiences were too precious. Now you realize that these relationships start the process before any crisis.
Only after several interactions will your resume take on a relevant form.
2. You got fired, and then your career stalledHow does it feel when you realize that “Fired” was either a great new beginning or a shareable life lesson? Being “set free” wasn’t doomsday, but it felt like it. It feels like the devil, in the form of disappointment, is following you. It took years to get over the sting. The needles and pins of pain. The cloudy and stormy feelings of shame.
Some people need help understanding why this happened, but others find that freedom and quick relief is what was meant to happen. You lost a job for reasons that are not uncommon for a person. If you haven’t reframed it in a positive way, now is the time to do so for the rest of your career.
3. You chose life over money.
Our parents told us to have fun and work hard in our 20s. Some of us were underemployed but refused to come home because we loved our freedom. We ate spam or ramen noodles to survive because we decided to immerse ourselves in our lives. The sting remains for years, but we can go to that place when challenges cloud our vision.
Sometimes we gain wisdom from there; Other times, Clarity or Novocaine. You can see the end of your story more clearly, so now you save. Even better, happiness used to have a different cash value. Your ability to manage a career brings a A smile and not a competitive smile.
4. You have lost the sense of technical and professional relationships.
Some technologies can become old school in no time. Your career path can quickly become irrelevant if you are not on top of the trends in your industry. Your friends indirectly challenged you to keep up because they were moving, and you knew you had to keep up.
Somewhere along the way, relationships have changed, priorities have been rearranged, and we feel like we need to start over. Technology permeates life now, so you need to keep up. It will take some time if you work on it daily.
5. You couldn’t take a “no” from a potential employer.
Rejection makes us stronger, and boy, does it hurt at the time.
Sometimes it turns out great, and then you’re grateful for the “trial”.
Remember those who benefited from your path and how it turned out because they are no better off without you. Whether you just started a new job yesterday or 20 years ago, you can list 20 ways you are valuable to your next employer. And do yourself a favor: Keep adding to the list.
6. The goddamn boss had value, after all.
We may not like the messenger, but the message was true. Sometimes our jagged little life-saving pill has been delivered by an ugly carrier pigeon, and we reject the message for the wrong reasons. In our late 30’s or early 40’s, we realize when a more acceptable package our ugly player boss was right. We hated the message and the messenger.
Don’t worry, most of us have been there, but it would have saved us or someone else heartache if we had looked much deeper into the message. The diamond is not in the delivery but in the package.
We come to a place where we realize what the most useful and valuable lessons are only sometimes identifiable at first. We may have arrived at a simpler place before the age of 40. But the only thing we do know is upon arrival. We value our career journey more because clarity is an irreplaceable part of our experience.
About Mark Anthony Dyson
I am the “Voice of Job Seekers!” I offer compassionate career and job search advice as I hack and reimagine the job search process. You should be “the employer’s job description register”. You must be solution-oriented and work in positions in companies where you are the remedy. Your job search must be a lifestyle, and your career must be in front of you at all times. You can no longer shed your ambitions at the change of seasons. There are strengths you have that need constant use and development. Be sure to subscribe to download my eBook, “421 Modern Job Search Tips 2021!” You can find my career and job advice in media outlets such as Forbes, Inc., Fast Company, Harvard Business Review, Glassdoor, and many other publications.
