How to Support Emotions at Work

A recent loss inspires me to shine a spotlight on mental health. There is no knowing what, if any, could have kept him here any longer, but I know many of us at this time who knew and loved him wonder what we could have done more.

These thoughts, though part of the natural process of mourning, are tortuous. However, there are so many who suffer from these thoughts after similar losses, who feel so irrational and unavoidable.

This is my best effort at this point to urge employers and co-workers to take care to implement preventative and mental health measures. This is what I know I can do to help while I feel helpless.

To eliminate the stigmatization of mental illness, we must also eliminate the stigma of emotions. We need to eliminate the stigma of therapy and normalize healthy outings, such as yoga, meditation, diary, walking, boxing, etc.

Remove the words “woo woo” and “new age” in the context of these practices. There is enough science at this point to establish their effectiveness, so using these words just makes you look ignorant, insensitive and outdated.

In addition, it is time for the workplace to encourage, even contain, these outlets.

If an employer assumes that employees take care of their emotional and mental health needs outside of work hours, that is a risky assumption.

Every manager and leader should be trained on how to create a comfortable environment for creating emotions and processing them, whether privately or with you. As individuals, we need to know how to address these needs on our own, but as a leader, you should be able to uncover these needs and know where to refer employees to address these needs.

What about physical health? Science has proven a link between mental health and physical health. Read more about the links and costs of it with us Mindfulness and EI Training Report.

What do you do as a person who experiences emotions at work?

First, do not apologize!

Second, fight your tendency to hide or suppress these feelings. Call them by their names. “I feel _______. I need a moment.”

You do not have to decide anything else at the moment – what to do next, what to say, whether to go home or stay, who you are bothering, etc.

You can leave the room, or stay there. It’s easier for me to be with my feelings when I’m alone, at least at first. So, I’ll probably leave the room. I would go out if I could, or towards any kind of nature – even opening a window would help.

Just allow it. Think of emotion as energy in movement – E-motion. It needs to flow. Breathing helps to convey emotion through your body. It’s so easy to forget to breathe in the middle of an intense emotion!

Be in it. Tune in to your body – where do you experience this emotion physically? Your head? Your chest? Shoulders and neck?

Even under “normal” circumstances, nothing affects your outcome in life more than how good you feel. Do your best to adjust your lifestyle and schedule to combine alternative methods to achieve a calm mind, a strong heart, clean lungs and a positive outlook.

Although we need connection, some of us are already emotionally fragile and need more upliftment versus more melancholy and doom. Be careful not to force your anxiety (which is justified, just not helpful) on others. So, if you are feeling anxious before a scheduled call or email, take some time to exercise to get the endorphins flowing or meditate to achieve a relaxed state of mind.

Include time in your schedule to be alone and engage in activities that raise your vibration while limiting stressful activities. Be aware of any tendency to pick up your phone or device to check for ongoing updates. Identify if searching for updates becomes a constraint that does not serve your state of mind. You can find a helpful sexual hypnosis session on Overcome social media addictionAs well as some other helpful videos on this topic Facebook page.

If you feel like a victim, start processing everything that happened to evoke those feelings. Have a mercy party. Write down all the events and feelings. Take them out, where you can refer to them after processing and find out what is real, what is true, what is a story, what is a discount and what is the product of your insecurity and limiting beliefs.

The time it takes to get through the emotion decreases as you get better at being with your pain.

At first, you may need a good 30 minutes, especially if the event was serious or historic. (If a hysterical response, the reason is historical!)

What other options are there?

What is in your control?

What result do you want? The desired outcome is not a necessary component in emotion processing, however after processing your emotions, you will have a better logical judgment about what you want to happen next – whether you need to go home, if you need to talk to someone, or if you are willing to deal with your colleagues again. To work and the boss.

You are not obligated to explain anything or apologize to anyone if you have dealt with your feelings in a healthy way. However, if someone was caught in the crossfire before you were able to process your emotion, you will need to decide if an apology is needed to restore your integrity or your relationships. Depending on the severity of the blow, you may need to do much more than apologize and there may be irreversible consequences.

Learn from these consequences, avoid them in the future, and do not define yourself by these human moments.

What do you do as a leader when a team member experiences emotions?

First, always validate emotions. Many managers and leaders do not want to be the recipient of anger, but it is an expression of ego, not empathy. Therefore, even if the anger is directed at you, confirm that a person has a “right” to feel how he feels.

Ask them if they want time to be alone or if they want to talk to you or someone else.

Beware of Attracting Human Resources If human resources in your company are more likely to respond disciplinary rather than resourceful. At their best, human resources professionals are quite experienced and trained in the service with certain consulting capabilities, but all too often there is a conflict of interest in event processing in accordance with policy and full emotional availability. There are also different levels of hardware that will surely exceed the usual skill set of human resources. If the team does not have a dedicated or licensed consultant or coach, the best method for human resources is to refer the employee to other resources.

If you become a secret person. Just listen. Do not consult. Give your employees a place to talk and process their feelings. Do not try to fix anything, if you as a leader have something to fix, until the feelings are equal. The message they need most is that you are committed to creating a safe place for them to share their feelings. You will have your own feelings about it, and you are justified in having those too, but for now, just focus on listening. Eventually, you may need to exercise your compassion. However, allow yourself to process your feelings before you decide.

If you and your girlfriend really want to prove that you care and are willing to invest in the mental and emotional well-being of your team, allocate a room just for their emotional health.

What types of things would an emotional health room include?

A variety of tools to express a variety of emotions, from designer to fear to anger.

  • privacy
  • Tissue box
  • plants
  • Punching bag
  • A small table with chairs in case anyone would like to talk about it
  • Papers and pens
  • Coloring books
  • Music / speakers
  • Pillows scream for content
  • Stuffed squeeze or toss
  • Help button
  • List of references to centers and guided meditations
  • trampoline
  • Resistance bands
  • Training mats
  • water fountain

Other concerns I have that require further research, perhaps research that has not yet been done, include clarifying the extent to which corporate leaders are receiving medications for mental illness. How does this affect their empathy centers in the brain and their ability to make conscious decisions? I’m sure there are cases where the drug improves their ability to deal with stressful situations, but I wonder about the situations related to people.

I’m not anti-drug in general, and no – I really do not want to stigmatize drugs. The side effects of many of these medications sometimes seem worse than the condition, and I do fear that medications are prescribed too often when there are other treatments, coping mechanisms and over-the-counter solutions that will present better long-term options for mental improvement. health. I know many people who have found healthier alternatives to medications, are able to stop the medications prescribed for them (under a doctor’s supervision), and then realize how numb they were. Dull is the most common word.

I wonder how much more challenging it is to be empathetic when you are numb.

If you have a personal story about it, I would love to hear it.

How were you taught to deal with your emotions?

How have you been taught to deal with the feelings of others?

Karen Holler is the creator of Ripple Drawing of Corporate Consciousness and author A sharp laser career focus: Find your goal and passion within 30 days. She founded Epic Careering, a leadership and career development company specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, in 2006.

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been in the recruitment and employment industry, her publications, presentations and coaching also draw from her experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing and sales. Its solutions combine breakthroughs in neuroscience, human performance optimization, bioenergetics and psychology to help leaders accelerate relationships, expand impact and increase engagement and productivity while maintaining business and the planet’s sustainability.

Ms. Holler was one of the first instructors on LinkedIn and is well known for her ability to identify and develop new trends. She is a certified professional resume writer, a certified career counselor, and a certified clinical hypnosis therapist, with a bachelor’s degree in communication and theater studies from Ursinus College and a master’s degree in creative writing. Her blog has been recognized as one of the top 100 blogs in her career worldwide by Feedspot.

She was an Associate Professor in the Department of Communication at the University of Cabrini and an Associate Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at the University of Drexel University. As an instructor at the Academy for Young Entrepreneurs, she helped two of her students win the 2018 National Competition to be selected for America’s Next Leading Young Entrepreneurs, win the 2019 People’s Choice Award, and land among the top 8 during a (virtual) 2020 national competition.

She is the secretary of the board of the Upper Marion Community Center and has just finished serving as vice president of the Gulf Elementary PTC, for which she has been recognized as a partner and promoter of public education by the Upper Marion Upper Education Association. She lives in the King of Prussia with her husband, two daughters and many pets, furry, feathered and scaly.

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